Last night Garret and I had an interesting conversation while we were in bed. We were talking about my former roommates. I told him I wished that there was some third party out there who could tell me I wasn't crazy and that Amy really was as rude and inconsiderate to me as I thought she was. Someone who could say that I was right. Someone who saw everything, weighed both sides and said no you're right. Sometimes it just feels like I made it all up because the only person who heard and saw everything is Garret and none of it seemed to bother him like it did me. He told me I wasn;t crazy and I believe him. I am really glad that he was there to help me not make things worse cause things could have gone violent or even more angry than they did. I'm glad he was there to help me get out of the situation and to protect me at least a little bit.
I don't know what I did to deserve him. But I am so happy to have him in my life. I complain sometimes because he may be a little slow on catching up to what I am thinking or feeling but I can't blame him for that. I change thoughts and feelings mid way through them all the time. It is hard for me to keep up sometimes. And he does pretty well catching up and the does an even better job making me feel better and taking care of the problems. It is nice to have him there. It is nice to know i have help and I don't have to do it all by myself. I know I could but it is still nice to not have to. I'm certain that he is it for me. That he is who I want.
I'm sure that I have said a lot of this stuff before. I have been really happy lately. I finally got to see Mel. I have been in the apartment everyday with Garret over break which has been absolutely wonderful. Garret is looking at a couple of jobs here in Farmington for the summer, one working as a research assistant with Nick Koban and one as a tutor for Upward Bound. I would like it if he was a little closer this summer. I know if he tutors for Upward Bound he will probably be in the dorms for a good portion of the summer since that is required but I will be able to visit him and we may have weekends together. There is no telling what will happen this summer. Garret was supposed to work at the hospital in Augusta this break but they had no hours for him then. They may or may not have hours for him this summer.
I feel pretty lucky to have my steady job at Staples. The people there like me. It is a long drive but it pays well and there are always plenty of hours for me. Sometimes I think they want me there a little bit too often. They called me in just yesterday. I'm sure it won't be the last time they call me in this semester. It is nice to know that I can probably keep my job there for as long as I like.
It is snowing outside again. I love snow. It is so calming and relaxing watching it hit the ground. Ok, enough stalling. I need to eat and get ready for my first day of the new semester. Wish me luck.
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