Monday

It's Monday and this Monday comes with more than the usual dread of returning to the week. I usually don't mind Mondays. Since I have been at school they are almost a break. I work on weekends at Staples. All weekend and being able to get away from there and return to a normal week of school is usually a relief. However, this semester I have taken on quite a bit more. Since taking practicum, a fourth class and working weekends last semester I have developed this sense of "I am Woman" and this feeling that I can do anything.

Unfortunately, it has driven me to pick up two extra days a week of work at Staples and to think that I can handle living with 3 roommates. The pitfalls of having too much confidence my friends. The good news is that the new work habits I picked up in practicum have kept me from drowning in the very heavy reading load that I did not expect an English class on Poetry to come with. 120 pages of reading assigned Thursday and due Tuesday is a little much even for someone who doesn't work all weekend like I do, don't you think?

Anyway, back to my point. This Monday is especially dreadful because not only did my obsessive work habits drive me to completely ignore myself again but they caused a major fight with everyone in the very tiny apartment I am living in. The fight happened Saturday night and I worked all day Sunday so I haven't yet had much interaction with everyone. Frankly. I'm dreading it. I'm sure they must all hate me. Even I hate me a little bit. But can I really blame myself for trying to keep ahead so that I don't drowned under the massive weight that has become my life once again? Can I really blame them for not working as tirelessly as me? It just seems like it all comes so easily for them while I'm here exhausted all the time. I work 30 hours a week, and take 4 classes. They can't say the same. Why does it bother me so much(and it always has) to see others have things more easily?