Life Update

I had 136 posts in this blog in 2010. So far in 2011 I have had 17. And the year is halfway over. I have obviously been busy. I didn't post a single thing in May. I graduated from college and didn't post one word about it. Maybe it is time for a short update.

Got dumped, had a very shitty time with it, started student teaching, started dating around, met a new boy, fell in love, graduated from college, moved into a one bedroom apartment near my brother in August, been busy applying for teaching jobs. You could probably figure most of this out from my random postings and because most of the people who read this know exactly what is going on in my life. I am actually not sure if anyone reads this. I used to know that at least two people were reading every post. Now I don't think anyone is. Maybe that is good. I mostly write here for myself. I was keeping a blog while I was student teaching. That was more for others to read as well as to help me reflect. I may continue to write in that blog if I get a job. I think it is important for teachers to reflect on their teaching.

Anyway, I have been looking for a job. I applied to 6 places so far. 2 have now gotten back to me. They didn't want to interview me. Part of me wonders if there wasn't something I could have done better in order to get the interviews. Part of me thinks that they just weren't good fits. Part of me thinks it was just because I haven't got any teaching experience yet. Part of me thinks I may never get a job. I have come so far. It would suck to fail now. What did I go to school for if not to teach? What have I been doing the past 4 years except working my ass of so that I could afford to go to school? It is frustrating to apply. It is hard. There is a lot that goes into each little packet that I send out. They could at least bring me in for an interview.

All I can really do is continue applying to schools and hope that one of them wants to hire me. There will be new openings as the summer progresses and maybe some of the people in the interviews won't pan out and I will get called after all. You never know. The important thing is that I am doing all I can do to try and get a job.

Until then I am working at Staples, seeing my family and friends whenever I can, reading a lot of books and visiting with my new boyfriend who ironically happens to be named Garrett. Everything and nothing changes in life. Garrett is nothing like Garret. Except their names sound alike. I have never met a guy who cares more about me than anything else. He cares about people in general more than anything else. His mom, his brother, his friends, me, the residents at the place he works at. If his heart got any bigger there wouldn't be room enough for it in his chest.

And he is sweet. And romantic. He leaves me youtube videos of songs he thinks I'll like on my Facebook wall. He tells me I'm beautiful. He buys me Reeses when I'm having a bad day. He remembers things I tell him. Like my favorite candy, my favorite smell, my favorite flower, my birthday, my favorite movie, my friends' names. He impresses every one he meets. He impresses me. He makes me laugh. He makes faces with me, plays with me, makes noises with me, speaks in funny voices with me. He never makes me feel small, or stupid. He likes when I talk about teaching, which while I was student teaching I did a lot. He likes that I am passionate about something and spends his time listening, not ridiculing my methods. He likes that I go out of my way for my friends. He likes that I would go out of my way for him if he ever needed me to.

I love the way he looks at me. Like I'm something special. It isn't a half bemused, half curious look. Its that small gentle smile that says, "I love you," "I'm so happy you're here," and "Wow. How did I get so lucky?"

I guess you could say that overall, life is different. Drastically different. Some of it is still hard, like the job hunt. But many parts are looking up again. And I'm hopeful.