Thanksgiving

Every year I spend Thanksgiving with my dad's extended family at my grandmother's house. There is all the usual foods. Turkey, corn, stuffing, gravy, potatoes, rolls, carrots and more. There are 9 grandchildren, including me, then there are my two aunts, John, my dad, my step-mom, Raymond and Mimi. We all crowd into my grandmother's tiny little house for this feast, for Christmas Eve, for Easter and sometimes for birthdays too. And right before we eat our feast, our mouths watering and barely able to contain our hunger anymore my grandmother makes us all hold hands around her kitchen island and say grace. Now I will admit that I usually just bow my head like a good girl and listen and hope it is short because I am hungry but this year was different. I held hands with the people standing next to me and I looked around at us all as we bowed our heads.

Standing there was my "boys". My brothers and my cousins. Standing there were my aunts. There was my dad and Kelly. There was my grandmother and Raymond. I couldn't help but look around and smile a little. And when I bowed my head to say grace I couldn't help but be proud of them.

We are all warriors in our own way. We must all be descended from a great plains people, from vikings or amazons. For even though we don't wear war pain or helms or throw giant spears at our enemies we fight battles.

My dad is a great Viking. He braves the seas of fear and of change. He has fears and anxieties all the time. Fear of the unknown. Fear of new places, new environments, new people. But yet here he is strong as ever gathered with his family around this feast. He is a mighty warrior indeed.

My step-mom, Kelly is a fiery red-head. An Irish warrior woman through and through. She would as soon cook you dinner as knock your head in for hurting one of her kids. She fights everyday to keep them safe and healthy. She is always afraid of germs and that they will get sick. She is a good mom.

My cousin, Coty is off braving the new world like some kind of sailor on board with Columbus. Off to new lands. He is going to school out in New York all by himself and studying to be a physical therapist. The only doctor in our family. He is brave and strong to go so far away from home.

My cousin, Scotty and my brother, Nick are like Indians getting ready to go on their first hunt alone or preparing to go on a spirit quest. They are seniors in high school. They have fought their way through the education system and have come up towards the top. They are getting ready to brave adulthood and find out what it means to be themselves.

My cousin, Casey remains the last little Indian in school. He is now braving the halls alone and he soon too will be facing adulthood.

My older cousin, Brandon has returned from Arizona. He is the lost wanderer who has returned home for a time. He left us to be with a girl and in doing so he learned what it meant to live and work on your own.

My older cousin, Justy is the Indian warrior who has decided to stay home and care for the tribe. He hasn't left us for college or for anything else. That too is a hard path. he has chosen to begin adulthood early.

My aunt Susie is a beautiful African warrior princess. She is tall and strong. She fights for her health. She has had to learn to eat right, quit smoking and exercise regularly. Life is important to fight for too.

My aunt Joyce is the American rock queen. She is tall and thin with beautiful long brown hair. She too must fight for health. She was not too long ago in the hospital because of her crohns. But she also fights for her children and for her relationship. For her home and for her safety.

I am not sure if I am like Elizabeth, Joan of Ark or Mary Queen of Scots. They were all women who took on men's parts. Sometimes surrounded by all these boys that is how I feel I must be. Sometimes when I am weak with emotions, with missing my family, with working, with school I imagine I am like these woman. Armored and ready for battle. Fighting the injustice men serve us by assuming we are weak because we are women. Fighting the injustice of being born a girl and poor meaning I have to work twice as hard to get half as far. Getting into UMF wouldn't be a big achievement for some but for me and my family it was the end of being told we couldn't.

And then there is my grandmother, my Mimi. She is warrior queen. She is an Amazon. She has fought all of these wars and more and yet here she is to see her grandchildren safely through just as she did for her children. She is the matriarch and head of my family. A family of warriors.